I just can’t take any song seriously that starts with a call-out of the performer or producer at the beginning. The fact that Pitbull feels the need to start all of his songs with “Mr. Worldwide,” or that RedOne gets called out during the opening seconds of Lady Gaga’s “Just Dance,” or that Mike-Will-Made-It needs everyone listening to know that, well, Mike-Will-Made-It, it automatically takes something away from the song, in my opinion. I’ve always been a big fan of letting the song and its performers speak for itself, and these unnecessary and clumsily placed call-outs almost never add to a song. Now granted, sometimes these call outs are done extremely well, so maybe I’m exaggerating a little bit, but someone like Akon has no reason to say “Konvict” at the beginning of any of his songs. Not only does he have the least intimidating voice out of any rapper (if you consider him to be a rapper), his voice is so unique already that we know it’s an Akon song as soon as he says something, so why does he feel the need to say anything?
Akon’s “Konvict” call out just ends up being shameless self-promotion – the name of the album that this #1 hit was featured on was called “Konvicted,” his tour was called the “Konvicted Tour,” he runs a label called Konvict Muzik, and, I guess the name isn’t completely out of nowhere considering he claims he was in prison for about 3 years total for being in a car theft ring…claims, which by the way, haven’t been truly verified.
So Akon is calling himself a “Konvict” despite the fact that he might not even be a real convict? Okay, fine, do what you want Akon.
The other interesting part of this song is that Snoop Dogg wasn’t originally supposed to be the featured artist – a rapper named Plies somehow got his hands on the track and might have been on his way to a feature on the track, but a shooting at one of his shows instigated by his entourage after his set was cut short by 15 minutes by the promoter put him in hot water. In comes Snoop, and there’s your #1 hit.
Besides featuring a “mandatory” Konvict call out at the beginning, “I Wanna Love You,” or the more explicit version “I Wanna Fuck You” is a pretty typical rap song whose lyrics center around hitting on a stripper who is “winding and grinding up on that pole.” Snoop Dogg contributes two verses – which actually probably saves this song at the end of the day from just being a oddly creepy Akon song. Snoop, along with the typical TR-808 handclaps supplying rhythm, make this a pretty average rap song (at best) that doesn’t break any new ground. Snoop, of course, has had better songs in his career, and even Akon had better songs (“Lonely,” his feature on Kardinal Offishall’s “Dangerous,”) and even had a better single from this album (“Smack That.”)
Nevertheless, “I Wanna Love/Fuck You” hit #1 for 2 weeks starting on December 2nd, 2006, but besides being a throwback for some of my generation, won’t stick out for being anything better than decent.